Wrath
The Downfall Of Us All.
When it comes to posts I try to only write when I've been inspired, when something happens that gives me the push to write about it. When I've been asked to write about something I'm honoured, but I wouldn't do it quick. Because something like this done in haste, doesn't come out right.
A close friend of mine has recently gone through some things, and this isn't just about them, because I hear it all the time from the people closest to my heart talking about the things that happen in their life. And in my life I'm never too far away from anger, so inspiration was easy to find. It's often too easy to blame someone's outbursts on anger problems, issues in their life, and being psychopathic. But the route we all tend to take is adopting that anger and transmitting it into our life, when it was elsewhere we were infected.
The most obvious thing to say is that when someone has an outburst at you, it's not through you that they're actually pissed off. People struggle to identify outlets for powerful emotions. When we're talking about love, passion or generally being honest and tearful, these are sometimes acceptable things to demonstrate socially. But with anger; one of the seven deadliest sins, if done publicly, or at another person, it's more often than not a cry for help - because that person has no one to talk to. Or has something on their mind that's really bothering them. The most difficult thing we face as social creatures, is being surrounded by one another but not being able to open up. I'm going to say this for men especially. We're living in a stupid pride, a pathetic ego, a ridiculous caveman instinct that showing such a side is seen as some kind of weakness, that'll make us lower in terms of manliness. Be a real man, grab a cheesy film and have a cry for God's sake. Bottling up your emotion is turning into pure raw anger, and your loved ones are victims of it.
I have to add: if you're genuinely in the wrong for doing something you know wasn't right, then listen to the person, find out what they're saying... Take it from me, the worst thing you could possibly do to an angry person is shout back at their face. It will never help you, it won't help them, and everything escalates badly. I've been involved and diffused so many incidents where an individual was screaming at the top of their voice, by answering all their questions, and giving my honest opinion in a lowered smooth tone. The thing here again, men come up with some form of screaming macho competition, and yeah.. that'll prove you're all big and strong. Why do I know how to diffuse a situation like that? Because form about 15 years I've spent my life in this macho competition mode, and gotten nowhere because of it. We're supposedly the most intelligent life form on the world, act it.
However, if you're sat in a living room; you sneezed, and receive an ashtray to the side of the face because you're a disappointment, reflect badly on your family - and an accident that got worse with age...... then yeah that person has something bottled up inside of them for a - very - long time. Slight over exaggeration but I'd advise getting the hell out of wherever it is you just got hit in the face. In this situation I would never advise turning around and looking that person in the eye and asking about their day... to be honest if you did I'd read for the coffee table. I'm saying listen to what they're saying, take hints from their outburst, because in their outburst is their reason for behaving like this. In their outburst, is what they want you to talk to them about. In their outburst, is a cry for help, not an opportunity to vocally battle one another.
I've spent too long in my life being angry, and there isn't a saying that's more accurate in our language than "life's too short" and that's because it's just so short. Why spend it unhappy, or in anger? In every situation your faced with there's a lesson, a person you can help, an event in your life that can get you closer to someone you think of as an opponent. I've spent too long looking at people who're smiling thinking - That's a mask - but it isn't. It's a really healthy way of life. See these moments as an opportunity to reach out and you won't be disappointed.
The most important thing here is that when a person is angry, let them be. Let them vent, try and establish an understanding of where it's from, and at a later convenient time, try to make a connection. Don't be that guy who hugs the person trying to rip your head off because that won't work either.
I live now that when someone has an outburst I try to understand why, I try to see what happened and why it was me that had the telling off, because most often I'd be the first person they'd seen, or I did something to set them off. It's a much better way of getting to grips with things and not battling one another, because that creates more tensions, more uncomfortable situations, and more bottled up emptions, and it's a negative wave that will keep spreading.
I don't mean to keep bagging men, but I am one, so that's why I'm always criticising. However, with women they're more open and emotional - and more sensible to get out those bottled emotions. Yet those women that live in anger, it's exactly the same thing as with the men. It's the curse of loneliness.
I hope this provided an entertaining read, and you take some of what I said on, and if not, please tell me why! :)
Please like, share, comment and discuss, I'd love to know what you're thinking.
OH...
and
Hakuna Matata
Alexander Yagoub
twitter: @ayagoub1
instagram:@alexmagooyag
A close friend of mine has recently gone through some things, and this isn't just about them, because I hear it all the time from the people closest to my heart talking about the things that happen in their life. And in my life I'm never too far away from anger, so inspiration was easy to find. It's often too easy to blame someone's outbursts on anger problems, issues in their life, and being psychopathic. But the route we all tend to take is adopting that anger and transmitting it into our life, when it was elsewhere we were infected.
The most obvious thing to say is that when someone has an outburst at you, it's not through you that they're actually pissed off. People struggle to identify outlets for powerful emotions. When we're talking about love, passion or generally being honest and tearful, these are sometimes acceptable things to demonstrate socially. But with anger; one of the seven deadliest sins, if done publicly, or at another person, it's more often than not a cry for help - because that person has no one to talk to. Or has something on their mind that's really bothering them. The most difficult thing we face as social creatures, is being surrounded by one another but not being able to open up. I'm going to say this for men especially. We're living in a stupid pride, a pathetic ego, a ridiculous caveman instinct that showing such a side is seen as some kind of weakness, that'll make us lower in terms of manliness. Be a real man, grab a cheesy film and have a cry for God's sake. Bottling up your emotion is turning into pure raw anger, and your loved ones are victims of it.
However, if you're sat in a living room; you sneezed, and receive an ashtray to the side of the face because you're a disappointment, reflect badly on your family - and an accident that got worse with age...... then yeah that person has something bottled up inside of them for a - very - long time. Slight over exaggeration but I'd advise getting the hell out of wherever it is you just got hit in the face. In this situation I would never advise turning around and looking that person in the eye and asking about their day... to be honest if you did I'd read for the coffee table. I'm saying listen to what they're saying, take hints from their outburst, because in their outburst is their reason for behaving like this. In their outburst, is what they want you to talk to them about. In their outburst, is a cry for help, not an opportunity to vocally battle one another.
I've spent too long in my life being angry, and there isn't a saying that's more accurate in our language than "life's too short" and that's because it's just so short. Why spend it unhappy, or in anger? In every situation your faced with there's a lesson, a person you can help, an event in your life that can get you closer to someone you think of as an opponent. I've spent too long looking at people who're smiling thinking - That's a mask - but it isn't. It's a really healthy way of life. See these moments as an opportunity to reach out and you won't be disappointed.
The most important thing here is that when a person is angry, let them be. Let them vent, try and establish an understanding of where it's from, and at a later convenient time, try to make a connection. Don't be that guy who hugs the person trying to rip your head off because that won't work either.
I don't mean to keep bagging men, but I am one, so that's why I'm always criticising. However, with women they're more open and emotional - and more sensible to get out those bottled emotions. Yet those women that live in anger, it's exactly the same thing as with the men. It's the curse of loneliness.
I hope this provided an entertaining read, and you take some of what I said on, and if not, please tell me why! :)
Please like, share, comment and discuss, I'd love to know what you're thinking.
OH...
and
Hakuna Matata
Alexander Yagoub
twitter: @ayagoub1
instagram:
I actually couldn't agree with you more. An outburst is always a result of something that person is hiding insider and way too many people don't recognise this.
ReplyDeleteThe other thing as well is way too many men think it's wrong or weird to cry or be emotional, that's normal. Acting all tough isn't what makes a man. What makes a man is integrity and honour and doing the right thing in your life anf the right thing by the people around you. We need to change this view of what is acceptable and unacceptable.